you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
