im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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