Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
