I faked an abortion last night.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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