Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
