I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
I know her cup size but not her name....
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