So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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