Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
