When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
