it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize