So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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