who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
