Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Randomize
