There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
