lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
