So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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