Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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