Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
