Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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