i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize
