What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I want to be your penis for a week.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
