i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
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