Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
are you still at the devil's house?
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Randomize