So drunk its hurt
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
