We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
it glows. i had to have it.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize