I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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