Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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