I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
