he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize