And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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