I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
