imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize