i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
people are starting to question the shark bite story
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
