hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
