he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
well you can't waste a boner
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
