i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I came so hard my ears popped.
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