Buhtt sex?
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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