My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
