can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
