Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
