You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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