Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
