If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Randomize
