My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
