its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Randomize
