She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
