My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize