my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
