they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
