at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Randomize